FEAR

The feal of not getting your most wanted desire. The fear that althou being so close you will loose it in one instant and things will be back to how things were before the light came and made the darkness in you disapear.  The fear that I will meet the darkness again. Althou, this all sounds observed. I dont think this light will ever leave me, even if I were REALLY in complete darkness. These are the things that are worth suffering, because like a very old wise lady told me once, Sorrow is your joy unmasked, so yes it was THAT GOOD, maybe instead of fear I should replace is with undiscribed happiness, because I dont think I ever would have known this kind of happiness exsisted if I would not have tried... I must be very lucky then..

I just remembered this :

On Joy and Sorrow
 Kahlil Gibran
Your joy is your sorrow unmasked.
And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears.
And how else can it be?
The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.
Is not the cup that holds your wine the very cup that was burned in the potter's oven?
And is not the lute that soothes your spirit, the very wood that was hollowed with knives?
When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy.
When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.

Some of you say, "Joy is greater thar sorrow," and others say, "Nay, sorrow is the greater."
But I say unto you, they are inseparable.
Together they come, and when one sits, alone with you at your board, remember that the other is asleep upon your bed.

Verily you are suspended like scales between your sorrow and your joy.
Only when you are empty are you at standstill and balanced.
When the treasure-keeper lifts you to weigh his gold and his silver, needs must your joy or your sorrow rise or fall.

Thank you.